By nature, a person must develop in life, learn about the world around him and himself, learn to find the right decisions, make choices, and improve himself.
Words and concepts familiar to everyone. Recently, the Internet has been filled with information about personal growth and spiritual development, many teachers and coaches have appeared who offer training on gaining self-confidence, changing thinking, and achieving success, wealth, personality psychology, self-development. Almost everyone promises to help personally and teach everyone how to develop, what to do for this, where to start.
Each of these people claims that he has developed the best, most effective, and most correct training system, which, alas, cannot be learned without a mentor and money. As a result, incredible results are promised when you become a self-sufficient, self-confident person, rich and successful, with your own business and a new position in life.
Probably, there is some truth in this, because any changes are always for the better … – that’s what wise people say. On the other hand, I must admit that there are really very worthwhile and useful points in such training courses. For some, they become turning points, and launch motivation for future life, people really change, they begin to look at things and the world around them in a different way. And this is very encouraging. But there are also many who fail, who cannot use the information received, and as a result are disappointed in learning, in life, and in themselves.
- Why is this happening?
- Why should a person necessarily develop?
- Why do some people succeed, while others do not?
Many questions, but no standard answers. Before finding the answers, let’s try to analyze the situation.
How it all starts
We begin our development in the family. Everyone has their own and under the influence of many factors, we learn our first steps in this life. Depending on the family situation, our upbringing and relationships formed our character, personality, there is the formation of our personality, to realize and develop skills.
Well, if the environment around us stimulates us to develop, then we get to know ourselves and the world around us much faster and better. But it happens that the environment is not entirely favorable, or parents are too controlling everything around, or a dysfunctional family. Then development can be slow, the child may not want to learn anything and closes in himself, in his virtual world.
Unfortunately, our pedagogical education and educational systems in schools very often leave much to be desired. Children are disappointed, they see an unfair attitude and rejection of them as individuals, which often depends on the material well-being of the family and public opinion.
Many of the frustrated children start to hang on computers and stop believing in themselves, do not develop their abilities, do not show activity, they just run away from reality … Others become cruel and angry, they believe that this is the only possible way to be someone in our life and succeed. Still, others begin to cheat and deceive, they are looking for all sorts of ways to achieve the desired result, even if they are dishonest or mean.
Only a few of these children, those who have a strong enough character, who have love and family support, who could learn from childhood to believe in themselves and their dreams, do not surrender to the will of difficulties. They go forward and achieve the desired result, get pleasure from life itself, and rejoice in every moment they live. But such people are few, alas.
When it comes to learning, successful and wealthy people develop their courses based on personal experience, based on lived situations, and established life principles. They take into account many different aspects, and education, and training, and family relationships, and work, but their own, personal …
Therefore, for many of those who undergo training with them, such courses do not work, because there are not even two identical people in this world. No one can walk the path of another and see life through his eyes. So there are no universal answers to questions, there are no universal cures for diseases, there are no identical paths to success, and there are no standard paths of development …
Each person has their own personal development path. How to understand and find it?
- Realize yourself
You need to start with knowing yourself, with accepting yourself as you are, with your thoughts, fears, feelings, with your life experience and memories, with your desires and dreams.
Sometimes it can be very difficult to accept yourself as you really are because you always want to be better. For the most part, people often play a role, try to appear different, seek outside approval or praise, want to be an example for many. And in this striving, they cease to be themselves and cease to develop as a person.
- Decide what you want to achieve
After a person realizes who he is, some people get stupid. After all, much of what we have done and aspired to in life turns out to be completely unnecessary for us, not ours. It is difficult to immediately determine what is mine then? There are many different ways to do this:
- listen to your subconscious, intuition;
- meditate in a calm atmosphere and formulate a question, wait a few days, the answer will surely come to you;
- take a closer look at what friends and acquaintances are doing, perhaps among their activities there is something that you would be happy to do;
- remember what you liked most to do as a child and what inspired you;
- even if none of the above methods worked for you, no need to retreat, keep looking.
It is also important to determine for yourself what spheres of life you want, because not always the one who is successful and rich is necessarily immediately happy and loved. Highlight for yourself the most important aspects, those without which you cannot imagine your life, and for each direction think about what you would like.
- Find ways to achieve
Think about how to achieve the desired result in every important aspect of your life. It so happens that a person seems to know what he wants, but how to get it, does not quite imagine. There are many different options, you can analyze information on the Internet, you can find out how others do in such cases, you can use the brainstorming method – sit down and write down all the thoughts that have come at the moment. You can try any of your options, the main thing is that you have a desire. And then everything will seem simple and understandable to you – you need to go forward without stopping.
So what is human development? Everyone will probably answer in their own way. I think that this is the desire to be better, better as a person, as a parent, as a friend, as a person. To be better in a sincere desire to help others, to be better in what you do today, in your work, in your hobbies. Every day to go forward, step by step, not to hide from difficulties, but to accept them and draw conclusions, not to hold on to the past and not to avoid responsibility, to be yourself in any life situations.
Whatever you do, do it sincerely, act according to your conscience, listen to yourself, to your feelings. Go to your desires, then you will have motivation for development, and life goals will appear. Maybe not everything will work out right away, but something will not work out at all, but whoever does nothing or lives according to someone else’s schemes will not be able to become a person, feel the taste of life, achieve goals, see the fulfillment of his desires.